Run Away from These 5 Bad Online Dating Photos
Online dating is a great way to meet new potential mates, especially if you don’t have much of a chance to interact socially outside of work. You can learn quite a bit about a person from what they say, and choose not to say, in their online profile. How they say it and how they spell it give huge clues too. Equally important though, are the photos they choose to post. I’ve used several of the popular sites on and off over the last few years and I’ve observed some very consistent warning signs with online dating photos. Here are my top five things to watch out for in a possible date’s photo profile:
- Only One Photo
This must be the most common mistake I see. If there is only one online dating photo in the profile, it’s a guarantee that the person no longer looks anything like the picture. Two or three photos are slightly better, half a dozen to a dozen are best. When you’re lucky enough to have that many pictures of someone to choose from, look for the one or two which are the least attractive. If you’re okay with what you see there, then you won’t have any surprises when you first meet.
- Only Portrait or Boudoir Photos
This one is very similar to the single-photo warning flag. I once had a first date with a divorced woman I’d talked to many times on the phone. Her profile had only a single photo: a warm, slightly fuzzy portrait which was probably taken just before her wedding day. At least ten years ago, maybe longer. I picked her up at her office and the only way I recognized her was by her voice. Months later, still searching, she finally posted a current picture on her online profile along with the same old portrait shot.
- No Smiling Photos
It’s unbelievable to me how many online dating photos I see on profiles where the subject isn’t smiling. I’m not talking about a huge grin here. A real smile makes anyone look very attractive. I’ve seen people scowling, glaring, on the verge of tears and staring at the floor in their photo profile. How can you think this would be attractive to anyone? Do you want me to think this is how you are all the time? And if you are, why would I want to date you?
- Photos With Other People Cropped Out
Digital cameras are cheap and friends who have them are easy to find. If all you can do is scan a photo you clipped your old girlfriend or boyfriend out of, except for the obligatory disembodied arm still wrapped around your shoulder, then it must be a pretty old shot. Online dating photos need to show what you look like now, not a long time ago.
- Photos With Parents
A photo of you with one or both of your parents is endearing, after a relationship is in motion. On an online profile before a first date, it’s just a potentially scary reminder of what you might look like in the not-too-distant future. Not to mention being a warning sign that you might spend just a bit too much time focused on your parents instead of your new online dating relationship.
If your potential date’s photo profile looks eerily like any of those I’ve described above, proceed with extreme caution or better yet, just skip on to the next one. If people can’t present themselves honestly through their online dating photos, then who knows what else they’re trying to hide? Those of you who are new to online dating might think I’m being a bit harsh. Trust me, I’ve read through hundreds of online dating profiles and seen thousands of pictures, which led to dozens of dates over the years, and these five observations are very consistent and very predictable. To succeed at online dating, you have to pay attention to details like these. Don’t be guilty of them yourself in your own photo profile, or you won’t have any dates either.
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